I had an interesting call last night. The caller is someone who has been angry, resentful and critical from time to time. And now he is attempting to resurrect a club that has had that as a culture. And he has now been the recipient of the same behavior he has shown. He was commenting to me last night how strange it was that a certain person was so mad, mad enough to completely miss the new possibility being offered. He was saying this as a critical comment.
It occurred to me to say so many things at that point! (That’s what you’ve done in the past, how does it feel to be on the other side of it?, etc). And Wisdom said, say something kind. So I remarked, I’ve found that when someone loses their bearings, they are NEVER open to new thinking! It’s not personal to you or to them. It’s just the way human beings work. Anger comes from being defended about something, and that defense keeps us from hearing the new ideas and connections. What I’ve learned from years of working with people is to notice the mood someone is in and be respectful. Don’t try to teach someone who is depressed or anxious or angry. Just listen and be patient. This too, like the weather, will pass. Once it passes, innate health and well-being will be available again, and the person will start to open up again, if you can remain neutral.